What do you tell your child to call their private parts?

We’re in the process of motivating Toddler Mojo to use the potty.  He’s just over two and a half, the potty has been purchased and now we’re waiting for it all to ‘click’.  Apparently it just ‘clicks’, that’s what every parent we’ve asked has said happens.

While we’re waiting for it to ‘click’ he’s been sitting on the potty; not doing the task that sounds like sitting which the potty is intended for.    On the potty the other day he pointed south and said something that could only be described as “what’s this?”

My wife and I haven’t discussed ‘this’ yet.  Granted ‘this’ is part of the equation that led us to this, but having a child who can barely talk ask you what ‘this’ is-was not expected.

My mind flashed forward to an 18 year old Mojo  bringing home some girl with a barbed wire tattoo on her arm, tramp stamp on her back and talking about the glories of beauty school or selling in-home water purification systems.  We needed to sort out what to call ‘this’ so that Toddler Mojo gets life started out on the right foot.

Penis

In theory this would be a good starting point because my wife and I are very factual.  I pictured myself telling Toddler Mojo, “son, that’s your penis and…”, but then I realized that another word could be so much more fun.

Tallywacker

When I was a kid this is what my dad called it.  Through the lens of a kid in the 70’s it might’ve been funny, but in today’s terminology it sounds more like a computer virus.  That, plus it has way too many syllables for a toddler to say.

Pee Pee

This was an option for a flash, but it was too close to the actual verb that he’ll hopefully be doing soon.   Wee Wee was also considered, but as a big Paul Reubens fan I know that I would’ve merged the two terms at some point.

Willie

You say Willie I say Groundskeeper.  Willie is the classic common name for little units and it’s also the one that I said when Toddler Mojo asked, “What’s this?”

Willie, it’s your Willie.  Every boy has a Willie.  We didn’t tell him what girls have.

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Daddy Mojo

Daddy Mojo is a blog written by Trey Burley, a stay at home dad, fanboy, husband and father. At Daddy Mojo we'll chat about home improvement, giveaways, family, children and poop culture. You can find out more about us at http://about.me/TreyBurley

3 thoughts on “What do you tell your child to call their private parts?”

  1. I am with Jetts31 – teach the correct words. In fact, using pseudonyms actually indirectly teaches/implies that the correct words are to be avoided or in a child’s mind maybe “bad”. Ditto for “potty”. Why “potty”? Why can’t it be bathroom? Even if your kid is too young to correctly pronounce “bathroom”, you’ll know what the kid is saying. I taught my first child to call it the “potty”and then later had to re-teach “bathroom”  when other kids learned”bathroom” sooner than he did. .Then it’s an effort for the kid to switch words as potty becomes the habit. Willie and potty are cute and all, sure, but they are not really helpful to your kid in the long run.

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