I like toys that thud in a wooden way. This is American Craft Week and nice wooden handmade blocks or trains are a great way to shape a childs imagination. Alternately I’m a big fan of the sock monkey, another handmade toy that makes adults smile and kids happy. Continue reading Handmade toys, sock monkeys and crafty dads
Category: Home
Home is where the heart is. In this category we’ll chat about anything relating to the home.
Dad runs an errand to the home improvement store
Since becoming a father one of the biggest changes have been the running of errands. All of them are consolidated and planned out like a-connect-the-dots course designed to get Baby Mojo home before feeding or nap.
The errand that has taken the biggest hit is the trip to the home improvement store. Now when we visit I don’t even get to use that large push cart. Baby Mojo sits in the normal shopping cart and waves to everybody in the store, a ten month old he just loves to wave. Initially it felt odd pushing a shopping cart, what with its’ confined ‘cart’; instead of the flat one that can hold anything in the store and was in itself a work out to move.
Prior to having a child I’d visit once a week, even if I didn’t need anything. Anything and need is all relative, I mean you can always use cleaning solvents and dirt. Continue reading Dad runs an errand to the home improvement store
The world’s worst screen window
Baby Mojo has been waking up at night lately. He had been sleeping for 7-8 hours, but with spring here we think he may be getting hot. It's too nice outside for the air conditioning to be on, half of our windows don't have screens and money is too tight to get a new screen professionally made. What's a stay at home dad with no time to do?
Duct tape across the window, even with the sticky side facing in, would look entirely too gauche. Mommy Mojo stepped up to the plate, did the research and found out that for $5.35 we can purchase a roll of screen material that we can cut ourselves. 
Technically, there’s nothing too difficult about the job. Granted there is 0% chance of the screen window actually looking good when it’s finished, but at least it wouldn’t be challenging or take too much time.
Measure twice, measure again, then cut once. The surface didn’t have the area to allow for actually duct tape (damn it…), so I used some painters tape on the exterior of the screen against the window frame. Screen window up, window open and Baby Mojo still woke up at 5AM. His little diaper had reached the limit of its absorbency and little Mojo was at his wit’s end, poor little dude.
My jury rigged screen window at least allows for a cross breeze to go through the house. It also has the added effect of a blue sticky surface that will trap some of the unlucky bugs. Their screams of pain will warn the others not to approach this steel grid of security.
Does anybody out there have a hammer drill? I needed one for a project a couple of years ago and my first thought was what the hell is a hammer drill? It sounds like some monster hybrid tool that can cure cancer. It’s best friends in the tool world are probably the grill router or pneumatic laser level.
I knew that I had to have a hammer drill. When I got to the tool store I also purchased a reciprocating saw, which is equally as practical and also has a kick ass name. That salesperson had struck novice home improvement gold. If he said that all the rage in testosterone home improvement was a gas-powered alarm clock I would’ve signed up for that too.
Apparently I wasn’t the only one who would fall for manly sounding gadgets. Did you hear that the federal government gave a Four Star Energy Rating to a gas-powered alarm clock, cleverly named Black Gold? Somewhere Jed Clampet is grinning at the gullibility of aspects of our government.
In my current reality, the hammer drill and all of these things sound like B-grade movies on Syfy. They’re filming Sharktopus, recently showed Mega Piranha and will air MothMan in a couple of weeks. You know you want to watch them, quit denying it.
In a couple of years if they get really desperate they can shoot Screen Hole, the story about the world’s worst storm window and how it created a worm hole to another dimension. I just hope they get Michael Cera to play me and not Shia LaBeouf.
Beijing showers, procrastination and dirty towels
Waiting tables in college taught me one lesson that I’ll always remember; never leave the kitchen empty-handed.
You leave the kitchen take something – anything – because it’s needed out front by somebody.
Since being a stay at home dad I’ve had to practice that lesson countless times, but it’s helped me keep the Mojo castle slightly cleaner. I’m leaving a room – I grab a bottle, cup or toy and put it in its rightful place.
This is basic stuff, but it’s light years from where I came from. Even tough I learned the original lesson in college, I went through The Dark Years (where dirt and procrastination where my best friends. )
The Shower
Before Baby Mojo came into the picture Mommy Mojo and I were dating and she was over at the house. She had to wash her face, went to turn on the hot water and was aghast that there wasn’t any. “Your hot water isn’t working, how long has it been out?”, she asked. To hear her tell the story, she was under the impression that it was something that happened a day or two ago.
“Oh, it’s been out a couple of months”, I answered with all seriousness.
“A COUPLE MONTHS? How do you shower? Can’t you get a plumber in here to fix it?”
“Oh, it’s not broken, I’ve got the parts to fix it in the other room….”. In hindsight I realize how silly it was to not have hot water in the bathroom. It was the worst case of procrastination I’d ever accomplished, I was busted and without an excuse.
“How do you shower?”, she said, which was quite a reasonable question considering.
“Well, I shower very quickly.”
“Why? When there’s hot water readily available?
“It’s not the worst place I’ve ever showered”
The worst place I’d showered was this hostel in Beijing. It was in the middle of winter, there was no hot water and there were multiple holes in the wall where I could look out onto various, smog covered buildings . It was cold, had broken tiles on the floor, a flimsy curtain with rips and one of those prison mirrors that cast a reflection but wasn’t really a mirror.
So, whenever I’d shower at home, I’d think of that awful, cold shower that I had in Beijing for that couple of weeks and it wasn’t that bad. The house was under renovation and the cold showers were a small price to pay for not getting on my stomach to light the pilot when it would go out.
Mommy Mojo didn’t see the logic in my story either and suggested that I stop procrastinating and get that hot water flowing ASAP.
The Dirty Towel
A couple of weeks after the hot water in the bathroom was fixed Mommy Mojo was washing her face and asked me to hand her a towel.
“Eww, this towel smells”, she said.
“oh. I might have accidentally given you the towel that I cleaned up the cat pee with”, I sheepishly said. She screamed and promptly threw away all of my towels. It was then that she washed her face for a second time and took a shower with our newfound hot water, using her towel.
On the positive side, I no longer have to clean up cat urine and we have all new towels.
Big knife pillow talk
The other night Mommy Mojo and I were going to bed. I was about to start reading my book when she had one of her questions that would befuddle Jack Handy.
“Sweetie, I decided that if an intruder comes into the house then I would take Jake, run out the house with my phone and call 911. What would you do?”
“We’ll, if I were stuck in the bedroom then I’d probably get the big knife”, I said.
I thought she knew about the big knife in the bedroom. “We have a big knife in the bedroom!?”, she said. At this point I suspected that my evening reading was probably not going to happen so I rolled out of the bed and proceeded to get the big knife.
It’s kept in my underwear drawer, so that way I can feign getting my socks or underwear when any burglars come in. ‘Oh, one moment Mr. Intruder, let me get some new socks on and I’ll show you where the valuables are…’, then I’d take the knife and get all Steven Segal on that predator.
I take the big knife out of the underwear drawer and my wife says, “Sweetie, that’s the big knife?
I wasn’t sure if I should run out and get the kitchen knife in my underwear drawer or lobby again for guns in the Mojo house.
Granted, in the kitchen, it’s not a big knife, but big is all relative. You put that knife someplace where you’re not expecting a knife, then it’s big. I put a tube of chap stick beside it so you can get a true scale of it’s blade.
Come to find out the big knife is a custom made cutter that can’t be duplicated. It was given to me on my 16th birthday, at the time a rather odd present I thought. My name is engraved on the edge of the blade and it’s something that I can pass down to Baby Mojo; so he can keep it in his underwear drawer when his wife won’t let him get a gun.
Mommy Mojo loves to ask deep questions right when we’re about to go to sleep.
True conversation
Mommy Mojo: Sweetie, would you still love me if I had amnesia?
Daddy Mojo: Yes, sweetie. I’d still love you if you had amnesia and when you asked me why we had 10 dogs I’d say, ‘sweetie, we had 10 dogs before you were sick, you don’t remember them?’
Since my big knife was ridiculed I’m going to lobby for something more effective to fight home intruders with, like a cross-bow. I’ll put a catherine wheel in the corner just in case I need to get all Sir Lancelot on that predator.
Can't we all just get along?
In a previous life I did communications, PR and management for an animal shelter. It was a fascinating job that let me experience the best and worst of humanity.
Sometimes people who adopted a pet are no longer able to care for them. Sometimes it’s a valid reason and sometimes people are just lazy or looking to hot potato a problem.
“We just had a child and don’t have time”, was
the main reason that folks gave when they had to surrender a pet. I totally understand the time required in raising a child. However if you really want to keep the pet it can be done.
Prior to Baby Mojo coming home we brought a blanket that had his scent to the dogs. That didn’t seem to have any bearing on how they treated him when he arrived.
Abby, the female black retriever was very interested and had to be beside Baby Mojo as much as possible. Whenever he cried, Abby had to be there, it was very cute. Wilson, the golden retriever showed affection, but didn’t seek out Baby Mojo.
We knew that our dogs were very affectionate and had been very well socialized. Prior to bringing home your child ask yourself honestly, how well socialized is my dog? You can socialize a dog, but that takes time. If you start early, take your dog to the park and doggie daycares that will help with their socialization. If it’s an advanced socialization issue I’d consult a trainer.
- Aggression is a totally different issue. If you know that you have an aggressive dog then they have to be dealt with immediately. An aggressive dog is not only a worry for your own home, but for the community around you.
Dogs may act out with children because they are scared, excited, sick or protecting their property.
If you’re not sure about how your dog is with children try taking their toys away. Was the dog apprehensive, calm, scared, tail wagging or did they growl? How is your dog when they’re scared? What scares them? You know how your dog behaves and probably have an idea of how they’ll be around children.
- You parents should never, and I mean never leave your child alone with your dog.
Some dog owners will be in denial about how social, friendly or just how big of a liability they have in their house. It seems odd to state that as it’s obvious to us, however, if you have any reservations about going to a house because of their dogs you should make that sentiment known to the home owners or do not visit.
Cats are a different matter. They’ll most likely hide from the child.
Our cats came out from under the bed occasionally at first and now they walk around like they own the place.
We still make time for all of our pets and it works out great. Having a child does not automatically mean that you have to get rid of your pet. A cat or dog can be a healthy addition to your family by teaching your child basic responsibilities.
Ultimately you are responsible for the pet though. If your child wants a pet and you’re getting the pet ‘for them’, remember that you’ll be doing all the work. Your child will certainly assist to some degree, be it getting their food or basic tasks that make your child part of the pet experience.
Rehoming or surrendering a pet is also a very difficult thing to do. There is no magic barn in the country for your cat and if your dog is the greatest in the world why aren’t you keeping them? If you surrender your pet to a local animal control office they could be euthanized after 3-7 business days. Humane societies are most often full and can’t accept pets on your schedule.
It’s no easy choice if you have to surrender a pet. Unless the pet is aggressive, you can make the pet and your children get along in the same house. If you’ve run the gamut on ideas and you’re having a problem, chat with your local humane society or a trainer.
Mojo Went a-courting
How people meet and fall in love can sometimes be an interesting, funny or embarrassing story.
Given that the name of the blog is Daddy Mojo, and not single guy on the corner mojo, you know that the story had a happy ending. However, I’ll share a quick story that, were we at a party together my Wife would be quick to tell you herself. This way I can get credit for telling the story while sanitizing it just a bit to save my dignity.
These pictures are what used to be my old house-after it was renovated. It really is an old house, built in 1908 and partially renovated by me, everything except the ceilings, subfloor and roof, you know, the expensive stuff.
Being a single guy I didn’t have too much in the way of creature comforts that would woo the women.
I did have:
- A futon
- A nice mountain bike
- A lawn mower
- Lots of power tools
- A sofa and television
- A couple plates, glasses and utensils
- Two cats
- One Dog
“Creature comforts” is an apt phrase. The animals were used to sleeping in the futon with me. I found it comforting when the cats would sleep on my feet, but they just seemed to wake her up. So the animals only lasted one night when girlfriend mojo entered the picture. The futon was placed on the floor, not on a bed frame; and you’ll note that a vacuum cleaner wasn’t included in my list of assets, so there was no shortage of pet fur anywhere in the house.
One spring day I cleaned the house by opening up all the doors and windows and plugging in the leaf blower. My neighbor said that he saw “plumes of fur” flying out of the house and wondered what was going on.
The sofa and television were in the living room. This was one of the few rooms that had an intact ceiling…
The rest of what I owned was in the living room, that’s the green room with the 10 foot section of plaster missing and a larger section of it dangling down. The living room was a certified disaster and I credit (now) Mommy Mojo for not running away forever.
- The section of plaster that fell down happened one night with a thunderous boom. I was thankful that it didn’t fall down on an animal and promptly cleaned it up the next day.
- So now the living room looks like a wasteland, heat or air goes immediately into the attic and there is always the threat of being knocked unconscious by a piece of plaster dangling from the ceiling.
- The lawn mower was also kept in that room. To me it was no big deal, but Mommy Mojo apparently had a huge fear of spontaneous combustion. The short term solution was to move it to the laundry room, I suggested killing all the grass, but she didn’t like that idea too much either.
I’m guessing that the 18 pound boy in the other room means that she forgave me for the lawnmower in the dining room. One lesson that we’ll teach Baby Mojo is to be clean, girls don’t (normally) tolerate messy guys, at least not to the extent that I was. Daddy Mojo has cleaned up his act much more so than I was, the car is still a bit in progress, but the house is enough to be presentable.
We do still have the problem with pet fur, but now we have a vacuum cleaner, so we don’t need to bring the leave blower inside.
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